Children who haven’t ever known a life without both parents living in the same house might be devastated if they find out their parents are splitting up. The uncertain future can lead to considerable stress for them.
It’s up to the parents in these situations to determine what the children need and to give them the stability that enables them to thrive. There are several things that you should think about as you’re coming up with a child custody agreement.
Equal splits aren’t always best
Each parent might want to spend as much time as they can with the children, but you must be realistic when you’re coming up with the parenting time split. Don’t become so focused on how much time each parent gets that you neglect to think about the quality of the time each person will have.
One example of how misleading the amount of time might be is this – Both parents agree to have the child three days at a time on a strict rotational basis.
One parent works five days per week for eight hours plus two hours of commuting. If the child is with that parent for three days when the parent is working, they’ll actually only see the parent 12 hours per day, but some of that time will be sleeping.
The other parent works from home and has a flexible schedule. This parent could spend as much time as they want with the kids on their three days. On paper, it seems like the parents have equal parenting time, but the reality is much different.
It’s always best to consider what options are best for the children. Most kids will want both parents involved in their upbringing. Trying to work things out so they have time with both parents is important. Your parenting plan should reflect what the children need.
